I recently took a free “values assessment” and WOW was it obvious it was written by a neurotypical.
Apparently four of my five top values are:
- Peace/calm
- Certainty
- Security
- Financial stability
These are amazingly boring and not representative of me at all.
They’re representative of my AUTISM.
It reminds me of a video review of Love on the Spectrum where the person says, disliking thunderstorms isn’t a quirky character trait, it’s part of REAL SENSORY ISSUES.
My therapist would probably insert here that it’s impossible to separate me from my autism. And I get that. But this values assessment was still wack. Many autistic people prefer structure, order, routine, predictability, etc. over spontaneity, surprises, and chaos! It’s just how our brains work!
Yes, peace and security and financial stability are important to me. I love schedules and order. But that’s not who I am. There are tons of other possibilities for core values, including some I think are a bit more accurate:
- Pleasure
- Curiosity
- Creativity
- Beauty
- Love
- Loyalty
- Honesty
- Uniqueness
- Compassion
- Growth
- Friendship
I hope eventually neurotypicals understand that autism isn’t a quirky character trait or a list of likes/dislikes, it’s sensory and communication stuff that isn’t a preference. IMO, it’s the equivalent of telling someone, “Oh, your core values are food and shelter and clean water!” No, those are just basic human needs. It’s accurate on a very basic level, but it doesn’t tell you ANYthing about the person’s unique likes/dislikes.
I imagine it would be similar for folks with ADHD. Their “core values” according to the assessment might be variety, stimulation, excitement, change, etc. because that’s what gives them dopamine! But that doesn’t fully explain what’s important to them.
Yes, I’m autistic. That tells you SOMEthing about me. But it doesn’t tell you everything, much less what my core values are.